The Mandalorian: Season Three - All The Rants
Bullet-pointed ramblings about The Mandalorian might be my favorite part of having a Disney+ subscription. There's no real point about all this other than that I'm having fun doing it. There are spoilers, but I don't care; this is best understood if you have already watched the season.
The third in a series of posts on 'My Thoughts on The Mandalorian' and other Star Wars series. A new thread after each season!
Chapter 17: The Apostle, err Apostil, no wait Apostate!
- Last time on, only it was in a different series, so... um... go watch that, then come back here.
- Do IRL blacksmiths get chubbies watching these forging scenes or do they groan in frustration at the inaccuracies?
- Giant crocodiles are so damn annoying. But also delicious!
- The toot when deus-ex-Mando appears is just perfect sound editing. This show needs an Emmy just for that.
- I love a good rules lawyer.
- 'Hey... who did the makeup and costumes for Pirates of the Carribean - can we get them for an episode to do up a couple aliens?'
- Sure - "respectable and not to be trifled with"; the humiliated foe definitely won't come back with more friends and cause havoc.
- "That's using your head." Some writer was really proud of that line.
- Pirates?! Shocking!! Who could have possibly seen this coming?
- Katee Sackhoff is always a win; however brief, I'm glad for the appearance.
Chapter 18: The Maybe This Show Isn't Terrible of Mandalore
I am starting to appreciate the narrative that this season is going about. The Mandalorian is on the grand quest, which we all think is pretty stupid (and maybe he does, too), but it is clearly important to him to be an accepted member of his tribe. At the same time, we are getting this training in The Way of the Mandalorian; not too dissimilar in how we, the audience, have been taught The Way of the Jedi over the decades. This season has a lot of potential and I hope that it doesn't squander this good opening.
- It's a throwaway line about the pressurized helment and Grogu getting into his pod, and I am glad it didn't get cut; I appreciate the little details.
- If an audience member hadn't seen The Book of Boba Fett, they would be really confused about why he was struggling to use the Dark Saber; they should have referenced that in the Previously On segment for this episode.
- Well that's a really fucking creepy droid / biological hybrid thing!
- Does Bo-Katan just spend all day in her armor brooding on her throne? Or did they only have the budget for one set piece and one day's worth of filming for all her scenes for the season?
- Okay, so I paused after the Bo-Katan rescue fight. The way I understand it, if the Dark Saber can only be rightly won in combat, and that bug-machine stole it from Mando, then it's now officially hers to wield and rule with? Let's see what loophole I missed.
- Wait?! He just pockets the Dark Saber and no one says anything about it?
- If saving his life once forever puts him in her debt, what does saving his life twice entail?
Chapter 19: The Convert (Are they talking about me?)
- When I have to deliberately stop remind myself to pause the show at the title card and make a comment here, I guess that means the episode is going well so far.
- "Empire, Rebels, New Republic, I can't keep track" - I feel you, dude.
- The scientist scene has strong "this guy is going to die" vibes; which quickly turned into strong "she a mole" vibes.
- What in the hell is going on with this episode? I WAS STARTING TO FEEL GOOD ABOUT THIS SHOW, YOU ASSHOLES.
- "It was a trap" Really?! - you went there, writers? I am back to dislike-watching this show (not quite hate-watching).
- This episode just makes me angry, now. The writers wasted a lot of time setting up the fact that there's one person who still harbors active sympathy for the Empire and for some reason killed the clone scientist. Guess what - don't care! The gunslinger, his quest, and Katee Sackhoff are the only reasons we're here. Cut out all the other bullshit, please and thank you.
Chapter 20: The Found The
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They really wanted to film a Top Gun scene, didn't they?
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They hit the engine, so I only have a bunch more flying I can do before the engine gives out at just the right time.
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All that bullshit in the previous episode so that we can experience a quick shot of that stupid rock?
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As far as flashback intros and outros go, I'm not upset about that one.
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I appreciate the costume choice of having several members with mismatching armor pieces; gives a solid sense of the ragtag nature of this crew.
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I'm glad the writers allow Bo-Katan to respect the local customs and ask questions about how to follow them.
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Don't shoot the raptor or use your jetpack, but I'm going to climb with my bigass gun and jetpack on. That seems to make sense.
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Once upon a time, there was a mom
Her name was Mrs. Pteranadon
Sitting on her nest she heard scratching and said
'Oh boy, my eggs are hatching'
One by one her kids popped free
Baby Pteranadons, one two three
'I'll name you Tiny, Shiny, and Don' -
"There's always a bigger fish." I wonder if anyone has said that before.
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The rescue scene was fun and I hope that they didn't blow their SFX budget on that at the expense of the rest of the season.
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"Mythosaur" reminds me of "unobtainium" and "handwavium" - let's just be blunt about how the audience is suppose to perceive this plot device.
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We're back to "mildly-dislike-watching"; this hasn't fully redeemed the sins of the last episode, but it's made up some ground.
Chapter 21: Yarrrrr, Pirates
- He couldn't even put the useless parts he took and put them back on the statue? Feels a bit disgraceful.
- Getting feelings of "help me,
Oni-Wan KenobiCaptain Teva, you're my only hope." - "Don’t hail me again unless it’s to surrender" - but... but... Gorian hailed Greef.
- Is that... a Tim Meadows sighting?! I shall join the fans in this delighting.
- These pirates are the worst sort of incompentence.
- What's with this consistent approach of lassoing a target, then beating/shooting it? If you can grappling hook it, can't you just shoot it first?!
- These needs a "I am Heavy Weapons Guy, and this is my new weapon." oh, or "Vzzzzzt! Rahrahrahrah! Vrrrrr! Wahahahaaaaaa!"
- Never fuck with a mama bear armorer, this is the way.
- The show seems to have tried to portray this whole pirate incident as a one-and-done, but also hint that Pirate King Gorian Shard has a boss and probably a boss's boss.
- If no one really cares about a glassed planet, does it really need to be "retaken", as if there is a looming battle? Isn't it more of a "fund the rebuilding" effort?
- Taken by Mandalorians or framed the Mandalorians? dun dun dun!
Chapter 22: Guns, Lots of Guns (for Hire)
- The Previously On talked about the Dark Saber, so can we get back to that little hiccup?
- The cold open was a cute little vingiette; I do hope that it gets tied into the greater story somehow later.
- "...taking back Mandalor" - But who has Mandalor?? I'm still trying to understand that.
- Nothing good happens when entering a banquet with chirpy, classical, background music.
- Lizzo and Jack Black: it actually pulls me out of the scene with this cameo. Hilarious to see them, but completely distracting.
- Katee Sackhoff's repeated look of "this can't be right" is wonderful. Why isn't there a meme of this expression?
- Hahaha - we can't have weapons, but since weapons are part of your religion, then you get to carry the weapons and pewpew all the things.
- Christopher Lloyd? This 'guns for hire' seems to be more like 'cameos for hire'.
- This side-quest of theirs feels like it's pulled directly from a video game.
- Go talk to this person.
- Initiate dialog, ignore most of what he says, wait for quest waypoint to update.
- Go to new area and stumble around until you find the correct triggering action.
- Get updated quest waypoint; travel there.
- Interrogate another NPC, triggering a chase event.
- Catch up to fleeing object and defeat it in battle. Collect loot and trigger next waypoint.
- Quest plot twist dialog.
- Surprise short battle to keep player enagaged.
- Random backstory that players will ignore all the details of, eventually leading to a waypoint update.
- Confront the true antagonist of the quest chain.
- Head back to original quest giver to close things out and receive that sweet loot.
- Go back to main quest line.
- I know I may sometimes fanboi on Katee Sackhoff (yes, it's her whole name, every time) - she adds more depth to the character than any other actor does to any other character in this show.
- I FUCKING CALLED IT!!! I was right all along about the dark saber shenanigan. I feel better now.
Chapter 23: Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy
- So many pointless guards just standing there, doing nothing.
- Grand Admiral Thrawn... cool... another random person that I guess I'm supposed to know? And what kind of a codename is "Project Necromancer"?
- Post "Long Live the Empire!", I expected a "now how do I hang up on this call, again?", in true Zoom fashion.
- How does the city not have sensors to say a vessel is approaching long before it starts hovering over the city?
- Kids are the worst.
- Bo-Katan, Din Djarin, Grogu, and The Armorer - that's quite the Mandalorian VIP ship.
- Falling out of a ship and landing gracefully using a rocket pack might be on my list of life goals.
- How have we gotten into hand-to-hand combat and there's no dark saber action?!
- I expected an ambush, but I didn't expect Din Djarin to be isolated as a part of it.
- "Next generation dark trooper suit"... /sigh... naming things is hard. I get it.
- The death scene needed a good final one-liner. Paz Vizsla deserved at least that much and I'm a little surprised that Jon Favreau's ego let him get killed off without a good sign off.
Chapter 24: The Return of the Aimless Plot
- A 42 minute episode and they use the first three minutes on the disappointing recap.
- In a previous episode, we saw that the jetpacks have a limited range when flying at high speeds while traversing the canyon. How can the jetpack, going full blast, make it all the way into space? This seems like a terrible oversite.
- Din Djarin is a prize capture and they leave just two peons to escort him? Even if there's internal tracking sensors, it seems like a waste of guards. Either let him run free and save the two lackey's lives or send more guards to escort and keep him contained.
- Jetpacks sure make ship-to-ship transfers a whole lot easier! That scene was a nice touch.
- No really?! How much jetpack fuel do they have??
- The Armorer charging in with hammer and wrench is hot.
- Did they learn nothing from the last ambush? Going after the primary antagonist, in his private lair, is always going to lead to bad things.
- The Din Djarin vs red suits really needed better gun-fu fight choregraphy. Having recently rewatched the John Wick series, I can only dream of how awesome that fight would have been.
- He has a super suit and they didn't show a corpse. What are the odds that Moff Gideon isn't actually dead?
- I understand the whole thing with not taking off his helmet for anyone, but isn't he allowed to take off the armor on his day off?
What comes next?
It seems there was a nice little bow tied around this series, even if it di wander a fair amount from episode to episode. I don't remember exactly how I felt about the previous two seasons as a distinct set of episodes. Which I am taking to mean that I probably felt the same way at the end of those as I do now. The story wasn't super compelling, but the show had glimpses of promise. The plot was loose and wandering and felt very trope-formulaic. I'll still be back next season, hate-watching and bullet-point ranting.